I WANT U 2..

Im beggin u ta come get me..

Hang around me..
Act like we friends til the end..
FAKE?
PHONY?
BITCH THATS U!

U still havent figured out what u need 2 know..
BWHAHA!
I BE...
THE..
C...A

Bitch like me..
CONTINUES 2 MATURE..LEARN..& GROW..

Im waitin 4 the likes of u..

2..

Come fuck with the likes of me..

Get cha weight up..

Bring ya bitches..

Ya mamas 2..

Bring some seedy..shady..grimy..opportunistic niggas 2!

Im ready 4 all of u!
U gone need'em..
Im talkin old skool ass whoopins..
Im talkin back handin the shit outta u..
like a pimp would do..

Im not duckin or dodgin or runnin from u bitches..

U niggas r bitches 2..

Got me so mad Im usin nigga n my vocab..
Im above all that.

U above all that?

Above all what..

Piece of shit cunts..

FUCK YOU WANT!?

Im standin here waitin!

BRINGGGGGGG EVERYOOOOOOONE!!!!

Lessons

Im drownin here..
How did I get here?
Great work ethic?
Hardwork pays off?
Persistence pays off?
CURSED?
Worse?
Loser?
Bum?
Scum?
Questions I ask myself..
Reflecting on my life..
Wondering how I can wake up from this nightmarish dream..
Searchin it seems..
4 Joy? Happiness? Peace? Peace of mind? The Lime?Life?Breath?
Yes
Somewhere, I lost site of things..
I lost a piece of me..
Somehow I hafta find it or surely I will fall prey..
2 the swarm circlin around me..
Ready to take me out..
If..
When..
I show any signs of weakness..
Ready pounce on my very being..
But..
My back..has carried the weight of many..
U think u were the 1st 2 want 2 take me out?
I refuse 2 conform...
2 give n 2 u..
2 lose when I know the WINNER n me..
TRUMPS the LOSER n u..
Just wait..ull c..clothes dont make shit but designers money...
Cars end up n junk yards..
Words mean shit...
So TALK it..
Ha!
Better yet..
Id rather u walk it..
But u..ur very being..every morsel in ur body..
Is workin on how u can dead me..
It..
Hates me..
Detests me..
Is waitin 4 me 2 give up..give in..2 quit..
But Ive prepared my whole life 4 u..without even knowin..
Rite now...my BODY is buildin as we speak..
u know wha I mean..
Uve heard me say it b4..
A BIGGER.
BETTER.
ME.

REFLECTIONS

Take a step back..

U really on that?

U really think that?

U dont believe ME?

I take that personal-ly..

I am the most honest 

straightforward person 

I know..

I have some work 2 do

I can reflect back..

I can think back..

Shouldve listened to my gut..

WTF! 

I seen The Bishop the other day..

Musta been a sign..I need 2 change my ways..

Reflections are all I see..

All I know..

Only way I know how 2 grow..

2 B the best imsoveritdotcom I can be..

U reallly don't know me..

I want errthing B about me?

Naw u do..

U didnt give me a chance..

Im kew with that..

Lessons Im willing 2 learn..

Strength ur givin me..

Each time u go hard..

Understand I build walls high as China..

Earthquakes shake me..

I reinvent myself again..

Build up still..

This time with steel..

Waiting on the next Tsunami 2 hit..

Aint that about a BITCH! 

My indomitable will wont let U win..

My fight is longer than ur plight..

Reflections are my secret 2 getting up again..

Reflections keep me humble..

Reflections help me stay in the ring..

Each time u hear the ding..

U wakin 2 my victory..

Im standin over u...

TKOed U..

Whose next?

What u got?

I have 3 more corners left...

Lace up..

I DONT GIVE A FUCK!

MY THOUGHTS

No woman ever wants to feel as if she is a fraction of herself to a man. We never want to be. I am an extremely guarded woman. When I let you into my world, it's because I wanted you there. Because I thought you deserved to be there and my intentions for you were good. It could be that I am a fraction of a woman to/and for you, and that is okay, I'd rather you find the woman who multiplies you and I find the man who multiplies me. The best thing about a fraction is it eventually makes a whole. 

IF I knew it all...IF I had done it all..IF I had experienced it all..I wouldn't have a need for humiliation..I wouldn't learn anything from those around me..I wouldn't have learned from example..I wouldn't understand right from wrong or "doing the right thing"..I wouldn't have morals, values, ethics..and I wouldn't have learned constructive criticism. I would be further than I am because I know and understand persistence pays off..I know and understand that I have broken barriers...I have created history..and whether anyone will ever or wants to acknowledge it..I HAVE DONE THINGS that no one else has EVER done...We ALL have..These are small feats in my little life..That are examples of my struggles and strifes..

Understand this..When you tell me something about me..I learn from it, I work on it, I hone it..

I BUILD A BIGGER...BETTER ME..I mean that with humility..

An INDOMITABLE WILL

I was probably born with will..I remember age 5 when you couldn't tell me anything and I didn't find a way to find out if it wasn't the truth...At age 8..I knew things and contemplated things 8 year olds shouldn't have thought about. I knew I was different from my entire family. I saw a light. That I knew throughout my life many would try to destroy. 

I used to wonder why I didn't have a distinct talent, Im not a singer, professional dancer, model, actress, designer, writer, or author. I often wondered, "Why don't I have a talent?" 

Until one day I realized, I did, I have, it's buried within the depths of my soul. I have always had this will, this force, that won't stop trying, this will that won't go away, this inability to give up or in or make excuses for my life.

If you knew where I came from, where Ive been, you wouldn't think my plight was against you, you wouldn't take the decisions and choices I make so personally. 

My GIFT is WILL..

MY GIFT is strength..

MY GIFT is woven so deep inside of me..that the more you try to cut it out..to destroy..

MY GIFT is automatically going to protect..

MY GIFT was learning to love and accept me for exactly who I am at an extremely early age..

MY GIFT doesn't expect you understand, but does expect you respect it.

If you are unable to do that, then I expect you to walk away..leave me be..I can't STOP being who I am for you. 

MY GIFT won't let me. 

MY GIFT has a plan in store for me..

I will ALWAYS protect myself because Ive always had too. She won't let you tear her down, spit her out and destroy her very being. She is prepared for you because she has already been torn apart by those close to her. So plot against me..she..her..I..Until there is no breath left in you..

MY GIFT understands this is all about you...

"U" & "UR" are relative statements...